Decisive Direction

All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them. Walt Disney

  One of my dreams has been developing more seriously over the last five years or so.  This dream deals primarily with kind of relationship I hope to develop with my future wife.  I believe this is the most important and potentialy the most wonderful and joyous processes in this life and in the world to come.  To realize that this dream will take a lot of work to prepare now, as well as continual effort during the various stages of the relationship is daunting.  I admit I feel a little inadequate -ok let's not soft-peddle it- really inadequate.  Courage is power to face daunting tasks, disappointments, challenges, and personal weaknesses with hope and optimism.  

  In class we talked about 4 stages of a relationship; each stage is important for the development of a strong and prosperous relationship.  We talked about the modern phenomena of sliding from one stage to another which results largely from indecisiveness.  Bro. Williams posed the idea that perhaps the kind of marriage a couple experiences is influenced by the way they moved from one stage to another.  It takes courage to move decisively from one stage to another because doing so necessitates openness, vulnerability, faith, and charity.  These stages are:      

1. Dating-  Many potential partners, many varied experiences
2. Courting- One partner, many varied experiences
3. Engagement- A time to plan a marriage, not just the wedding
4. Marriage- Consecration, Charity, Covenants

  In reality the story shouldn't end with "happily ever after."  What does that mean?  It means we can't just expect everything to magically become happy and perfect even if we did marry in the right place to the right person.  Many become disillusioned and even doubtful a short time after the wedding because reality sets in again.   This can be avoided if the couple is willing to make adjustments together.  A loving, caring, joyful marriage takes time, effort, and sacrifice.

4 R's of Marriage Adjustments:

1. Routines
2. Resources 
3. Roles
4. Rules